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My boss Dick Lumbergh is five years older than me, makes twice my salary and should probably not be allowed to use an electric toaster, much less be in charge of a technology department for a mid-sized company. Yes, it looks like a dunce cap for a reason. You see, Dick likes to change...
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Now that I’m a manager I’m seeing more “things” going on in my company that I never knew about before. I see the pains they take to do things the right way by layering on bureaucratic procedure after bureaucratic procedure in an attempt to do things the right way. I see how they work...
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Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer: “Microsoft is committed to spreading our You’reIn!” REDMOND, WA – Inspired by the overnight success and impressive first week sales figures of Nintendo’s scatologically named gaming console the Wii (pronounced “wee”), Microsoft has announced that it will create an interactive XBOX 360 module that will allow a player to gyrate...
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We’re having our biweekly scavenger hunt this morning. The only thing in our list, as it is every other week, is “something which will hold hot coffee without scalding our hands or leaking all over our desks and dripping into our very sensitive nether regions.” The Styrofoam Holy Grail of our office You see,...
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PodUtil restores your iPod music to your PC. It’s been a rough couple of months for me and technology. A couple of months ago I turned my iPod on to find that it simply wasn’t working. After some research and wacky experimentation I figured out how to fix my iPod with the sad iPod...
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Halloween – Because carving patterns into squash, lighting them on fire and leaving them on your front door step makes perfect sense. A recent study has shown that the United States of America is only second in the world when it comes to official recognition of meaningless holidays such as Halloween. The country which...
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Caring for a newborn baby is kind of like caring for a bag full of beef jerky, except the beef jerky is slightly more aware of your existence. For the first couple of weeks newborn babies generally do the following in no particular order: 1. Cry. 2. Eat. 3. Poop. 4. Trick you into...
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Go ahead… guess how much… I hate carrying spare change. This fact will be important in a moment. In addition to having a new baby in the house, I’m sort of changing job positions. I’m cleaning out my desk and moving from one building in my company to another building in my company. I’ll...
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My son’s arrival into the world last week began with two words that are more associated with contraception than birth. “Oh shit.” It was my wife, exclaiming this at about 3:45 in the morning. Me, still mostly asleep, took the phrase rather literally and uttered, “Bad dog!” thinking our faithful Papillon just couldn’t wait...
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