Monthly Archives: May 2006

A Fool In The Pool

It’s summertime and all you swimming pool owners know that the most important step in caring for a pool is filling it with cement and turning it into a tennis court. This is a very logical step after you spend most of your summer and life savings each year trying to turn your pool...
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Google Adsense Nonsense

I am constantly amused by the useless sorts of advertisements that Google Adsense slaps on my blog. I put the little advertising bar along the side of my pages hoping to earn a few pennies for all the hours and hours of every night, lovingly hand-weaving these little words out of only the finest,...
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Poopy Cat

There is poo all over my house right now. Lots and lots of poo. Today my wife and I woke up to a smell which can only be described as “exploded baby ass.” This was unexpected for two reasons: 1. Really, you never expect to wake up to an exploded baby ass odor. 2....
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How To Buy A House

My wife and I recently decided that we were living under our means, and as patriotic Americans we should really be buried in so much debt that any suggestion of ever paying off all our bills should be met with screams of laughter. This strategy seems to be working for our federal government so...
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The Eyes Have It

I wear glasses. I make no secret of the fact that my eyes are genetically mutated when compared to you few out there who can recognize faces in satellite photos, spot friends in airplanes cruising at thirty thousand feet and read bumper stickers in adjacent states. I’ve gotten quite used to waking each morning...
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Pseudoephedrine Stupidity – Confessions of a Drug Addict

I suffer from seasonal allergies. For a month or two at the beginning of Spring and another few weeks at the end of Fall I become a blubbering, snorting, sneezing, snotty watery-eyed fountain of phlegm unless I stay on a fairly regular course of decongestants and antihistamines. I pretty much NEED to take them,...
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