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Good Morning, Sunshine!… Now Get Your Ass Back To Bed

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Good Morning, Sunshine!… Now Get Your Ass Back To Bed

My son gets a lot of things from me: his charming personality, his dashing good looks and his razor sharp intellect. Sure, he’s not yet four, but he can count up to 30 without leaving out more than one or two numbers and he has developed some stunning Candy Land strategies. You Bastard! Among...
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Give Me Mileage or Give Me Death – Why I Drive

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Always Drive To Conference

There you are, in a one-on-one meeting with your mentally challenged Liberal Arts major of a boss and he’s droning on and on about the importance of “covering all points of the compass out the box with the low hanging fruit” and “win-win solutions that push the envelope paradigm” when he suddenly start asking...
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Steve Job Owes Me For the iPad

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atari-400

Other than Apple’s blatant rip-off of my own iPad product from 2006, I (in agreement with most of the free world) was fairly underwhelmed by what Steve Jobs unveiled today. Let’s face it, the iPad probably won’t go down in the annals of history of computing as one of Apple’s more half-baked ideas, like...
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On Becoming A Humor Columnist

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On Becoming A Humor Columnist

When I was growing up I didn’t want to be a fireman, policeman or some shmuck that worked in an office. I wanted to be a humor columnist. Specifically, I wanted to be Dave Barry, or at least Dave Barry with the weekly Parade magazine column and without the awful haircut. I loved the...
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Jura Signature Range Espresso Machines

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Jura Coffee Machine

  I’d like to tell you all about the new Jura Signature Range Espresso machines not because I’m actually a coffee connoisseur and not because this line of coffee makers and espresso machines will clearly rank somewhere in my list of the world’s most expensive coffee makers, but rather because I was sent a...
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Review of Bobby’s Burger Palace (BBP) in Eatontown NJ

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bobbyflay

My wife and I took a few days off this week and we decided to give the new Bobby Flay Burger Palace in Eatontown, NJ a quick try because my wife and I both think Bobby Flay comes across as a jerk on TV but his food is usually pretty darn good. We drove...
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Hurricane Headlines

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Hurricane Headlines

Once again hurricanes are in the headlines and once again I have a morbid and unnatural fascination not with the storms themselves but with how the media chooses to report on them. I imagine reporters are given “Hurricane Stories” in the same way that privates in the Army are given “latrine duty.” Both jobs...
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How To Fix that USB Device Not Recognized Error in Windows Vista

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How To Fix that USB Device Not Recognized Error in Windows Vista

I’ve had the dreaded Windows Vista for exactly a year now and I just had my first real “issue” with the OS. It was the dreaded Windows Vista “USB Device Not Recognized” error that seemed to appear after a quick power blip in my home. For those of you not familiar with the famous...
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House Hunters Drinking Game

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House Hunters Drinking Game

My wife and I like to watch the HGTV show called House Hunters which is a pseudo reality show that follows someone as he or she looks at three homes and ultimately buys one. It’s one of those shows you never actively sit down to watch, but rather you find yourself watching when nothing...
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